I have spent the majority of last year avoiding connection. While I am still working though the reasons behind why that became my norm, I am also moving past it. I see now that I wasn’t only avoiding connection with others, I was avoiding connection with myself. Since starting this self-care project, I have been doing the work of reconnecting with myself, and over the past week I have prioritized connecting with some of the wonderful humans in my life.
I sought out plans and said yes to invitations. Instead of falling into my default and making up excuses to cancel, I showed up. I even accepted a last minute spontaneous dinner invite - surprising myself because spontaneity is definitely not one of my strong suits, and it was also going to be my first time out with couples since becoming decoupled (that def created some feels). It was honestly a challenge to say yes, but I finally did. Guess what, the world didn’t come to a screeching halt and there were no awkward single-girl catastrophes - just delicious pizza, a tasty old fashioned, and some good company.
I realize I am blessed to know so many incredible, supportive women that challenge me to dig deep and be the best possible version of myself. Despite how long I have been hiding away, it was like no time had lapsed. We skipped over surface-level conversation and dove right into the deep end. Topics ranged from relationships to politics, dreams for new endeavors to the magic and mystery of the universe. Each interaction left me feeling full, uplifted and inspired - a total 180 from being depleted by social interactions.
In the past 2 weeks I have seen the truth of the quote above - in allowing for connection with myself, I create space for connection with others and vice versa.